Luke Cracks me up!!!

So I have been meaning to get my pics from Halloween on the computer before Thanksgiving hahaha but that’s looking like a NO considering it’s on Thursday so instead I would like to discuss my lil comedian. Luke is talking up a storm these days and just says some of the funniest things. You really start to notice what your go to words and phrases are in your vocabulary when you have a "parrot" running around repeating everything you say. Now I’m putting a disclaimer out there now, that not everyone is going to find some of thing things as funny as I do especially if you don’t enjoy cussing, but I do, and have since middle school and there’s no teaching an old dog new tricks so if you’re going to be offended or turn me into CPS for cussing in my own house you should stop reading now :) Now on with you fellow sailors, it turns out that my favorite 2 words to put behind every statement is “damn it” and “Jesus”. Doesn’t seem that bad right!?! Like really, damn is not a cuss word in my book, well until you hear a 2 year old say while trying to put on his shoes! Luke was sitting down stairs playing while I was cleaning the bathroom (Josh will say this is a lie but I swear I was!). I had come out to put something in the boy’s bedroom and when I made it back into the hallway I notice him sitting by the couch trying to shove his foot into his shoe. Now he’s making these lil grunt noises as it’s a tie shoe and was still tied from the time before and he just can’t manage to get his foot inside. So then he proceeds to say "Damn it mom! shoes on" which I cannot help but burst into laughter which yes I know is the worst thing you can do because now he’s going to think it’s hilarious whenever he says it but let’s be honest it is hahaha so after I control myself I of course tell him that it is big boy word and that he’s not to say it. But it’s just something about little ones using cuss words in such perfect context that makes it funny. Not so much when they are just chanting it because they know they are not suppose to say but when it pops out in normal conversation. Like the other night Josh and I were trying to get Luke to go to bed and he just kept repeating something we couldn’t understand and finally clear as day after us asking him “What?” 10 times he goes “want to lay on the couch downstairs Jesus” Like really I’ve said this 10 times what are you guys not getting. Once again Josh and I are cracking up because I’m sorry it was hilarious. And he is definitely his mother’s son that’s for sure! I of course now am trying to reel in the damn its and Jesus’ but sometimes they still slip out and its harder than you think. Early this summer my friend Alisha took Luke to her friends 1 year old daughter’s birthday and right in the middle of her destroying her own cake like any 1 year old does on their birthday, Luke yells out in front of all those strangers “No Lucy, making a damn mess!” Couldn’t have pulled a more exact statement out of my own mouth! I can’t tell you how many times I have said “why do you have to make such a damn mess” in the past year haha or how many times I have had to hide my grin when Luke asks me “more milk mom, Jesus”. He also says normal kid things that are funny, like just this Saturday I was looking for my purse, and I knew he had seen it as he was playing with my keys that were in it. So I said “where’s my purse Lukie?” and he goes “I’ll find it for you mommy” and continues to yell “Purse! Where are you, Purse?” throughout the house. I love when he looks at me when I’m laughing because he doesn’t get what is funny and kind of gives me a stink eye like you’re crazy lady! Can’t get enough of him and he keeps us laughing all the time and I can’t wait to hear what else this kid is thinking in that big melon of his :)

Mega Baby part Deux is 4 ½ months!

So I have been super busy at work as this is our end of quarter month so don’t tell anyone I’m blogging instead of booking out deals hahaha So 2 weeks ago I swore Ryde’s 4 month check up was on Tuesday and sent Josh and the boys to Kaiser that afternoon. Well mom brain aka mush melon was wrong! His appointment was actually on Wednesday, I even have it written down on my calendar at work for Wednesday but for some reason got it in my head that it was Tuesday woops, but thankfully they were able to squeeze them in or I’m sure I would have received a nasty lil call from my wonderful LP J Unfortunately he was unable to see his regular Doc but Josh said the lady he saw was super nice. She asked if we were feeding him cereal yet as he was “massive and is probably really hungry” haha So you can imagine how much he weighs, 18.5lbs! So the 96% tile. He’s even bigger than the first mega baby, Luke. So maybe Ryde will be the muscle haha He is 2’3” so 95% tile and his head is 17” and in the 74% tile unlike his bro he’s got a normal size head which I thank him for ;) My lil Salty dog is getting less salty by the day and stronger too. He loves to stand and jump on your lap which is a workout for the person holding him as he is a lil tank! He absolutely adores Luke! he gets the biggest smile when he catches a glimpse of Luke, as Luke doesn’t stand still for very long. Ryde is always trying to track him when they are in the same room and gets his lil legs going as if he wants to run after him. He rolls over every once in awhile but that’s a lot of weight to move around when you’re that small haha so usually he’s content with the half roll as long as he can see what he’s trying too. He does get frustrated easily when he tries to do something and it doesn’t quite work out but I try to remind him he’s only 4 months old but I think its goes through one ear out the other. He smiles so much now and is less serious but every once in awhile he’ll get in a “mood” and no matter what you do he just stares at you very unimpressed. He doesn’t really care for tummy time anymore he would rather sit up and see the world and be carried around. He loves “flying” with daddy and no matter how salty he is you can always get a smile out of him. He’s my strong silent type and doesn’t “talk” much usually, really only in the mornings and after naps and it’s not really talking as more of yelling haha he’s already a loud talker like his uncle Luke and Chad! He’s the worst eater on the planet right now and most of what I put in his mouth he spits right out but practice makes perfect and if he doesn’t start eating rice soon we are going to have to start buying formula to keep up with his appetite! He still doesn’t sleep through the night so I’m consistently one tired mama but this is what I signed up for so no bitching right?!? I bet Josh would beg to differ; my excuse for everything is “I’m tired”. “Why you mad?” I’m tired “Why is Laundry crib not folded?” I’m tired “Why does the sink look like 30 people live here” I’m… well you get the idea hahaha I’m fucking tired people this being a working mama is no joke! After writing this I just realized where Luke gets his “why” questions from! Everything is Why? Why? Why? Between him and his dad I probably hear it 100 times a day haha. Alright got a lil off track here, back to my Ryde pants. Like I said before and will be saying for the rest of my life, the time is going too fast and I find myself just holding him and crying a bit (when will this STOP!?!?) at night before I put him down to bed as I want to cherish this time as he’s my last baby (I’m 98% sure of this hahaha don’t tell Josh!) and I just can’t believe how lucky I am, in some aspects of life, well the important ones anyways :) Love my 3 boys!

“If I didn’t have bad luck I would have no luck at all”

So it’s been 1 week since that dreaded Val Chavez bad luck returned. For those who don’t know my dad always says “Val, If you didn’t have bad luck you would have no luck at all” that’s my motto people haha and over the years I have become accustomed to it but sometimes the bad luck is worse than other times and last weeks run in was a doozy! So I’m driving home from work to pick up my precious minions on a blustery day when all of a sudden something came crashing into my windshield. The first words out of this sailors mouth, plug your ears if cursing offends you, “Mother fucker” and as I slow down and come to a stop my next thought, ear muffs again, “was that a god damn tree” of course it was! We are talking about my luck people, a fucking tree fell out of the fucking sky on to my brand new fucking car! Ok cursing is over. As I look into my rear view mirror, oh wait it’s not there! So I glance at my side mirror and there it was, not so much as a branch but the top of a freaking tree in the middle of the street and people are having to drive around it. So I put the car in park and start to assess the damage around, glass is everywhere and my roof is caved in and then I realize I should probably call 911. Don’t worry my blue tooth through my car stereo was still working as I’m trying to talk to the 911 operator through my phone and continue to say I can’t really hear you haha when I realized there was a police car right behind me so no need for the 911 call so I said thanks and hang up. Still have manners in the middle of a crisis :) So the 2 officers open up both my doors and begin asking me if I was ok, and what the hell happen and I’m thinking really guy did you not just drive by the (red wood haha) in the middle of the street, put your detective hat on and start putting some clues together! But of course I was polite and said “I’m pretty sure a gust of wind blew a tree down on to my car as I was driving by” and he proceeds to say “well think of it this way, 1 crazy thing happens to everyone in their life time and now yours is over” and my reply “ I rolled my truck into a fence when I was 17” hahaha the officer chuckled and said “ok maybe 2 for you” and I said “yeah this is my luck believe it or not” at this time the circus started showing up, ambulance, fire trucks, more cop cars. 10,000 people asking 20,000 questions when all I was concerned about was who was picking up the boys and to make sure my pump comes wherever I go( mamas got to pump people!). So I was able to call Josh and basically blurt out “I need you to pick up the boys as I’m going to be taken away in an ambulance cuz a tree fell on my car” of course he’s like “what?!?!” and I get annoyed and just repeat what I just said only louder and snottier. So Josh accepts my demands and we hang up so now it’s time for me to be stretched away into the ambulance for some CAT scans an x-rays to makes sure I don’t have to sue the city of Aurora for my pain and suffering ;) So after what seemed like a 30 min drive to Aurora south which is like 5 mins from where this shit show happened I lay alone in my hospital bed with one of those oh so comfy neck braces on trying to feel around in my glass filled purse for my cell phone so I can call my mother who I know is panicking as we speak. So I find my phone and call her and she is basically yelling at me “where are you” and I tell her Aurora South, “no you’re not” she proceeds to tell me, “um I’m pretty sure that I am Wendo so just drive here and relax as you’re not helping the situation” (as she rarely does in these situations, she’s the worse panicker on the planet!) She finally shows up and waits with me till my LP can show up and she can go relieve Bill who’s watching both minions by himself!! (one of the scarier things that day haha) so I get my tests done and am released about 2 ½ hours later which I thought was pretty good for an ER visit. Josh and I stopped by the scene of the crime if you will to take some photos of the tree and the piece that fell on my car, you never know when you’ll need pics. Then it’s off to fill my prescription and then a shower to get these mini glass shards or razor blades as I was calling them out of every crevice of my body slowly cutting me every time I moved and then too bed! What a day right?!?! Just another day in the life of Val Chavez and it never just ends there, oh no it always gets better hahaha Cubie is not totaled so only have to come up with a $500 deductible to pick her up in 3 to 4 weeks! UGH like I said I’m in the market to sell a Kidney so If there is any takers out there please call me and leave a detailed message and I will get back to you! Kidney goes to the highest bidder :)

So some final thoughts now that I have had a week to reflect, a much as I hate hearing this and as much as it pains me to say, yeah yeah it could have been worse, I get it and am thankful that it wasn’t but sometimes that not what you want to hear ya know. Sometimes you just want to scream at the top of your lungs WTF!!! So I have had that moment (maybe a few of them), I’ve cried because it sometimes feels like I can’t catch a break, I’ve chuckled just thinking “what are the odds Val, what are the odds?!?!” but I am just thankful that my minions where not in the car and they are happy and healthy and that I have the best support system a girl could ask for as I wouldn’t get through any of this bad luck without them and they have kept me afloat and off suicide watch a few times in my day and I am forever thankful! So thanks for all the well wishes and offers of help they are all appreciated and I am humbled by all the love. So here’s to “keep on truckin” even though it’s pretty shitty sometimes hahaha Peace and Love people


Poor Cubie :(




Oh hey tree where's your top half, oh thats right on my brand new car!!

You’ve heard of the Silver back, now meet the shit back

So my Salty dog is not easily entertained so up until Saturday he would only enjoy his monkey jumper for a whole 10 mins, I mean I can get so much shit done in 10 mins, SIKE! So I wanted to try out a pumpkin pie cupcake recipe on Saturday and thought I would put him in his jumper for the allotted 10 mins while I got things started. Well 20 mins later I had noticed I hadn’t heard his usual cranking around so I peeked downstairs and he was just bouncing away. And I thought “Jack pot” I may get these cupcakes done before he even noticed I was gone. Which I totally did, he jumped for an hour and I even got to watch a lil teen mom on the DVR without one peep out of him!! Then all of a sudden he started yelling so I knew it was probably time to eat so I go down to pick him up and got a whiff of you know what and thought no wonder he was pissed he had pooped his pants! I mean I can only imagine how mad I would be if I had to wear my dirty poop pants all day! So I proceed to pick him up and then there it was, a blow out all the way up his back in his footie pjs. UGH I thought and took him upstairs for a bath since it was bath day any way. So I sit him on my bed on his tummy so I can strategically pull his jam jams off without getting yellow, instant staining, mustard poop on my bed. (this shit is lethal) So I get his footie’s off and try to wipe some of the poop off with the already dirtied clothes which didn’t work as well as I had hoped so I thought “wipes DUH” so I turn around to grab the wipes out of his cradle literally next to my bed, I mean I didn’t even take a step I just turned at the waist people! And what does Ryde decided to do… Roll over from his tummy to his back for the first time ever! Which is totally awesome except for the part that he has major shit back! I can’t help but laugh and curse at the same time which of course gets the parrots’ attention, “what’s shit mom?” of course out of everything I say you pick up on shit, Luke. This is my nightmare. So I decided my white sheets are already stained (and come on I was asking for this, what Mom of 2 hellions buys white sheets for her bed really?!?) so I just leave Ryde on his back and begin to praise him for being so strong and smart and Luke’s just yelling “eww! Ryde Pooped Ryde Pooped! hahaha oh I swear this shit (pun intended) only happens to me ;) Till the shit show commences once again. Peace and Poop people peace and poop

This was him in his jumper the day before this incident ;)

Lukes first Rockies game!!!

So I have been a busy bee lately and haven’t got to blog about Luke’s first Rockies game! A couple Fridays ago Wendo, Big Luke and I took Mini Luke to his first Rockies game ever! I had bought him a lil Rockies jersey for his birthday in May thinking I would take him to a few games over the summer and here we were looking at only 4 home games left in the middle of September hahaha I was going to be mad about spending 40 bucks on that mini jersey and he never got to wear it to an actual game damn it!! So I bought some rock pile tickets for us 4 for a Friday night game since my boy is a night owl ;) and the bonus was that it was fan appreciation day (thanks for buying tickets even though we sucked it up this year) so they we doing a firework show after the game! And boy does Luke LOVE fireworks! After the fourth of July every twinkling light in the sky Luke would point and say “firework” so I knew if we could just get him to not act like a toddler tool for the whole game so we didn’t have to leave early he would love it! So since my salty dog would never make it 4 hours without acting like a baby tool we dropped him off at my Aunt Veronicas so she could get her baby fix and that way Wendo and I could tag team Luke at the game! Right before we are about to leave our friends Nate and Heather had offered up some club level seats that she got from her work that came with a sweet parking pass so Wendo jumped on that deal and we upgraded ourselves to club level! They were awesome seats and although we were seating by some Giants fans they were super nice and the daughters loved Luke! We also found out that Meg and Cody were also sitting in club level with the family Meg nannies for so towards the end of the game we went over and sat with them as they were at the end and there were plenty of open seats for the kiddos to run around in. Luke did so well we bought him his own sprite in a big boy cup and his very own cotton candy (that of course Wendo and I had some of, fat kids!) He was so hopped up on sugar he couldn’t even think about having a toddler meltdown and was a perfect lil Angel! So we made it to firework time!!!! He sat on his Nonnies lap and just pointed to the fireworks the whole time and just kept repeating, “cool, amazing, fireworks”. I don’t know what it is but ever since my minions were born experiencing things with them just make everything that much more fun and cooler for a lack of a better word. Don’t get me wrong I’m sure I would have thought the show was pretty sweet pre minions but experiencing it with Luke that night made it fucking bad ass (sorry of cursing)and I of course couldn’t help but tear up as I’m just so thankful for them and just making my everyday life better! So we will for sure do it again next year!!

SUPER LUKE

How do you make a super hero take a nap!! Haha that was my dilemma on Wednesday when I played hooky from work to hang out with my boys. So Josh has Tuesdays and Wednesdays off so every once in awhile I’ll take a personal day so we can have a “weekend” together. Well this day off consisted of Josh out in the garage working on his 10th Honda (may be exaggerating but you don’t know he may actually be on his 10th Honda people! I never know what he’s doing out there haha) with Luke out there helping (aka making a mess) and Salty Dog and I catching up on our trash t.v. Well it was nap time and Luke came in and I was trying to get him to lay down, but he kept just jumping of his bed yelling “SUPER LUKE” He puts his arm out like you would to give someone a forearm shiver and that’s his Batman or Superman run. I of course couldn't’t resist laughing at this but tried to keep my laughter under raps as I tell him “Lukey its time to take a nap” And as he stands on his bed with his fore arm out he looks at me and goes “but mom I’m Super Luke” and proceeds to jump off his bed. I couldn't’t hold it in any longer and just started cracking up which of course fuels his fire and at this point there is NOWAY he’s taking a nap, he’s freaking Super Luke, and I was no match for him. So instead we played until he felt he had fought enough crime for the day and then decided it was ok to take a nap. He laid down and all he said was “Thanks Mom” and I of course start crying like a big old baby and say “any time Luke”. So I guess I answered my own question, sometimes you have to take orders form a super hero! I think I may get out the sewing machine and make him his own bad ass cape this coming week, what’s a Super Luke without his cape right?!? Ill try and get some video of his superman run but his paparazzi reaction to my camera is only getting worse! All my pics of him lately are of just his hands as he says “no no no”

Ryde is 3 Months!!!!!!!!!!

So as I sit here at work and think about how fast the last 3 months have gone by I cant help but get a lil teary eyed, yep I’m a big old Nancy still even post pregnancy hormones! I just can’t believe how fast it has gone, it feels like just a couple weeks ago I was as big as a house still and impatiently awaiting the arrival of my newest minion. And now he is 3 months old and has completed our lil family of 4. Ryde is such a joy and has definitely tried my patience as a mother. I call him my high maintenance one :) He is just such a determined lil guy. It always seems like his wheels are turning and trying to figure out this world around him. He has really warmed up a bit and his smile kills me every time and LOVE how excited he gets when he sees me and wants me to pick him up. He is so strong and is already sitting up in our laps without having to rest on your chest and just wants to do everything by himself which of course makes him salty when he cant, hence his nick name salty dog hahaha. He’s sleeping decently at night which at this point isn’t a big deal considering I have to get up to pump every 3 hours anyway so its not like he’s the only thing keeping me from my long lost love, sleep! Wendo says he supposedly slept 8-9 hours straight when he spent the night last weekend which I find hard to believe but if it’s true he should be spending the night more often! Luke just adores him and is the best lil helper you could ask for. He’ll get Ryde diapers, hold his pacifier in when he’s crying, likes to hold him on the couch, and is always concerned if we leave and Ryde isn’t with us. I just hope this Love between them last long into their teenage years ;) Ryde is still sleeping in his cradle next to our bed and will probably stay in there till he sleeps through the night or doesn’t fit in it anymore, which ever comes first haha and then he will move into his room next to ours with Luke which I can already tell will be an interesting experience! I’m glad all the good deeds and giving all those bums money has come back to me with some good Karma because I am one lucky mama to have 2 of the greatest boys I could have asked for! And am so thankful for the women they are making me, as I would be lost without them!

Smiling Boy

Luke helping him out

Kisses!

More smiles!!


He's a man

Holding his pacifier

Tummy Time

I hate Winnie the Pooh, why you ask? Who knows hahaha but I do! So look what his Aunt Emilee bought him! Look how sad he is, he must share his mom's hate for the Pooh!

Hanging with The Mouse

First he's Sour... then he's sweet :)

You have all seen those commercials for Sour patch kids, "First their sour, and then their sweet" Well this couldn’t explain our mini Luke any better! The other night we were all hanging out downstairs, Josh, Big Luke, Me and the minions and Luke’s new favorite game is called "fight". He says fight and then comes at you with these lil fists of fury. Now 90% of the time it’s funny and cute but every once in awhile he'll catch you off guard and cheep shot ya in the face (ask Josh about this haha) Anyways so we are all watching tv and Big Luke is laying on the loveseat and Mini Luke comes up as says “fight” and punches Luke in the stomach and immediately after puts his head to the side and says “Hi” in his sweet voice. We all start laughing and Josh says “first he’s sour then he’s sweet” which of course makes us all start laughing harder because it so true! So it’s now his new catch phrase. Who knew a 2 year old could be so funny?!?

Big Boi! I said Big boi!

So Ryde had his 2 month check up yesterday. Our doctor said he’s a big healthy boy and although he’s in the 91% tile for his weight, 13lbs 14 oz, that he is tall so its ok that he’s a fatty hahaha. He’s already 2 ft tall and is in the 85% tile for his height. He’s got a lil dome compared to his brothers, coming in at the 50% tile which I was thankful for at birth ;) He got 3 shots which is always rough on both of us and had to get his foot pricked to get some blood drawn to check his jaundice levels. The whites of his eyes were still a lil yellow so he wanted to make sure his levels were not too high. So needless to say he was not a happy camper! They called me this morning and said his jaundice levels were normal for a breastfed baby at 2 months and that his yellowish eyes should go away with time, I’m glad that my lil man is thriving and all my pumping work is paying off because it is not convenient to pump every 3 hours let me tell you, well except at work hahaha I don’t mind having to take a “meeting break” by myself every couple hours, the smokers get to!

My baby is 2 months old today!

Holy 2 months batman! I can’t believe that Ryde is 2 months old today. He’s definitely out of his new born stage which I have mix feelings about. I’m sad that he’s growing so fast and that this is my last baby so I’ll never have a new born again which makes me really sad but that will pass :) I do love that he’s sleeping longer in between feedings during the night, about 5 hours now, and that he’s smiling and working so hard on those neck muscles! He has the cutest “O” face while he does it too. He can do a half roll from stomach to side consistently and has done a full roll once from front to back. It’s so funny because he always seems like he has something to say and is trying so hard to voice it. He’s definitely my serious baby as of now; he has this serious face and is always just trying to figure things out. I love that he’s more snuggly now and doesn’t seem so fragile and he’s has the chunkiest chipmunk cheeks that I can’t get enough of. When we do tummy time on mom’s tummy I just kiss them over and over when he rests his head, some of my favorite time right now! He loves to try and stand and work on his leg muscles, he’s already in such a hurry to grow up which is only going to get worse once he starts trying to do everything he sees Luke doing. He’s “talking” and cooing now which is too cute and I have a few videos I’ll upload when I get home, it’s just so precious that he thinks he’s really saying something. He’s getting a little better with giving me a break to do things when he’s awake but I use the word little loosely! Maybe once or twice a day he’ll entertain himself for 10 to 15 mins or so when he’s awake so I can try to pick up after the toddler tornado that blows through our house daily or attempt to eat something hahaha while it’s still hot. He has had an ultra sound and a VCUG (they pump fluid and dye into his bladder through a catheter and take x-rays of his kidneys and bladder to make sure they are doing what they are suppose to) to monitor his enlarge Kidneys and there is still some fluid in them but everything seems to be functioning properly so he will have another ultrasound at 6 months to see if the fluid is still there or not. I’m finally starting to get our routine down with less meltdowns on ALL our parts which is nice ;) He goes in for his 2 month check up on Wednesday and I’ll update you on his weight and height and see how much he’s grown since he was 2 weeks old!! Two months has gone by so fast and doesn’t seem like a long time in the grand scheme of things but I feel like he’s been here forever and can’t imagine life with out him. I’ve been so very blessed with my 2 lil men and thank god daily for them. Just wish time would slow down just a lil!

1 Successful Trip down, 1,000 to go!

So yesterday I got a wild hair and decided that I would take the boys to the water park for a picnic and some outside time considering I was in a full body sweat suit as my house is freezing. I LOVE my central air!! So I start to pack up some stuff as Luke is still napping and get Ryde dressed as they NEVER seem to nap at the same time right now damn it! So when Luke woke up I asked if he wanted to go to the water park that Pa took him to a couple weeks ago. So when I say water park its not like a full blown water park its just one of those at the park by our house that has the kooky pipes that spray water out of them and the kids just run through them. So he of course says NO because that is his answer to everything so I say fine Ryde and I will go with out you haha which always works so he proceeds to start repeating or chanting as I like to call it "water park, water park" So I get him dressed and we are on our way. I stopped to get a sweet tea from Mc D's as I am obsessed with them and get Luke a happy meal for the first time (now he’s had a happy meal before, I just had never bought him one) so that we could have a lil picnic while he played at the park. So we arrive and I pack myself like a mule and then let Luke out of the car hoping he would listen. So I see a tree open by the water side of the park so I set up camp there. Luke sits down for 3 secs and then is off. He didn’t actually get in the water he mostly surveyed the outer perimeter; I was unable to take him out there as I was holding Ryde. So I was standing on the outside and Luke played in the puddles for like 10 mins but didn’t get wet by any of the structures and wanted to just go play on the regular play ground. Which would have been fine but my "camp" wasn’t close enough to watch Luke from so I had to just pack it up a lil and leave it and try and keep an eye on it and Luke at the same time, I do live in A-town people ;) So I make it over to the playground where Luke is running around like a wild man and I start to freak out a lil bit wondering about how I’m going to get him back to our spot and in the car with no free hands! So after 30 mins of him running around all red faced I ask him if he wanted something to drink to try and lure him back to our camp so I could put Ryde in his car seat and wrangle Luke in the Car as it was so hot and he was all sweaty. So thank god he said "cup" and started walking over to get his cup and he sat down and drank it while I packed Ryde up, threw away our trash, and packed myself like a mule again. I told him it was time to go which usually never ends good at the park, which I did get a lil attitude and a couple no's but no full blown Luke Chavez blow up and I was able to pack them in the car with out wishing I was dead! I was so excited that it went so well that I forgot my precious Sweet tea on top of my car but thankfully some bystanders waved me down before it fell off! And I was thinking double jack pot! Any other day that drink would have spilt all over my car because that’s my luck haha So I wanted to brag all around town but then I realized women do this everyday, some with even more kids! So I thought I would just keep it as my own personal victory and save the momentum for a bigger trip maybe next weekend, who knows where, the sky’s the limit now people!!! I'm back in the running for Mother of the year bitches!

Luke’s first Staples

So when I wrote the title to this post, Luke’s FIRST staples it made me feel like I was implying this is going to happen again which I hope not because it was defiantly one of the worst experiences I have had as a parent thus far. But I do have 2 boys on my hands and if Ryde is anything like his big bro I’m in trouble! So last Friday I took my traveling circus to Aunt Tess’s house for some leisure time with the fam dam but once again I was sadly mistaken! Not 20 mins into our stay we were headed to the emergency room for the first time. Luke was outside playing with the dogs and some squirt guns that Aunt Tess had laying around out back along with some much beloved side walk chalk. Luke loves side walk chalk but not for the purpose of drawing on the side walks, oh no that would be too easy, he likes to draw on things you wouldn’t normally draw on, lawn furniture, grills, decks, etc… So I’m inside getting Ryde situated out of his car seat and and getting him settled when I hear Luke start screaming out side. I open the screen door and hes running toward me crying. I pick him up and ask what happen and he says hurt and I ask him where as I set him down and pull pup his shorts and sleeves looking for what he he’s talking about. I can’t find anything so just when I ask him again I notice a lil blood trickling down the back of his neck. Ahh horseshit! So I take him inside and take him to the bathroom to get a better look at it in the light. Instantly I think he’s going to need stitches, granted this is coming form the girl who’s only had 1 stitch in her whole life, yep one single stitch in my finger when I was 6 after my brother stepped on my hand as I was touching a metal ant stake (When my mom asked Luke why he did it, “I don’t know”) I freaked out so bad that they had to strap me down to a board to get me to stay still haha Anyways, I ask Meg and Tess what they think and they both were unsure so I thought lets ask the dude in the house. At this point Luke was fine, he asked me to kiss it and was on his way. It wasn’t bleeding bad it was just a wide wound so I asked Cody what he thought considering he had like 20 staples in his leg at the moment haha and he was like “oh yeah he’s definitely going to need stitches” so Luke and I were on our way! I called the after hours nurse hotline wondering if I had to drive all the way downtown (minimum 40 min drive) to the Kaiser Hospital or if I could take him any where. While I was listening to the options I found out that one of the clinics was open “after hours” Jack pot! That way I don’t have to pay the $100 co pay at the emergency room! So next I call the LP to let him know what’s going on. He had called earlier and received a hall pass to go out for the night and was getting ready to go out with some friends. I told him I would just take him and if I need him to come I would call him later. Bad idea I should have just made him come considering I was about to experience the worst thing ever! So we get into the room and the doctor explains that instead of shooting him with a needle of anesthetic we were going to use a topical anesthetic, and yes I said WE! So he pours this liquid on a cotton ball, tells me to grab a glove, and that I’m going to hold this cotton ball on his head for 5 mins to numb the area, ummm I’m sorry WTF!!!!!! Am I a nurse getting paid right now and was unaware! Am I going to pick up a check at the front desk on my way out?!?! Seriously dude! So he starts off and puts it on Lukes wound and he of course starts screaming bloody murder and then the Doc is like “ok here you go” so I put pressure on the cotton ball and try to hold him with my other arm and calm him down. He’s just screaming and crying and saying “Mommy Stop” “Hurt Hurt” OMG it was awful. Now on our way there I was patting myself on the back because I thought I stayed cool under the pressure didn’t freak out at Tess’s house, and even told Luke in the car “good thing your Nonnie wasn’t here or she would be a panicking mess” hahaha little did I know I was going to be the one causing my lil man pain once we got there. So you can just imagine both of us in this lil room sitting on the table crying our eyes out. So I start signing this song my mom use to sing to me when I was super young when I was sick or hurt that we now sing to the boys and I finally get him calmed down then the fucking doctor walks in and says “well since he’s letting you hold it on there I’m going to have you do it for 5 more mins” Really dick that was just the worst 5 mins of my life right there buddy! Well Luke starts crying again and I’m trying not to cry and soothe him but I can’t keep it together at this point. Finally the 10 mins is up and the doc walks in with a nurse and I’m thinking where the fuck was she the last 10 mins! He grabs some gauze and cleaning stuff and starts to clean Luke’s head and get an idea of how big it is. And then all of a sudden he pulls out a glorified staple gun and proceeds to shoot 3 staples into my sons head without any warning. I obviously let out a gasp as I was not prepared for that! He asked if I was alright and I was just like “yeah I just didn’t realize it was an actual staple gun and some warning would have been nice” So he gives me some care instructions and we were done!! Luke was fine once he realized we were on our way home and passed out 3 mins into the trip. I called Josh to let him now what happened and told him that that was the last stapling I would be a part of :) I picked up Ryde from Tess’s which was nice that I didn’t have to take him along, that would have been hard to take care of him while I held Luke down in a wrestling move. Josh took Luke in today to get the staples removed and said he didn’t cry and barely notice what the nurse was doing so hopefully its healing nicely, ill have to check it out when I get home. Hopefully this will be our only experience with staples, haha here’s to wishful thinking right?!?

Heres a pic that Josh tried to get of the Staples but Luke was having none of it

Here is what an Ant Stake is hahaha cut my finger on the sharp corner back when they were metal, they are plastic now :)

This is my Nightmare...

So I want to put a disclaimer out their first before I proceed with this post. This blog is not to scare people off of having kids, there are more good times then bad by a long shot and I WOULDN'T trade it for anything in the world and I love my lil minions more then anything but writing about the debacles is much more funny then our day to day I love you’s, don’t get me wrong I will write about those occasionally, but I find the train wreaks more entertaining as I'm sure you do, its always funny when its happening to some else right!?! On with the (shit) show...

So for those of you who do not share my LOVE for reality TV, (Bill) yesterday was the first "Jersday" of the new season of Jersey Shore. Now I just can’t get enough of this stupid show and enjoy watching it with friends to just discuss the fiascos that unravels each week. It’s dumb, stupid, whatever you want to call it but I love it :) So last night the mini gorilla juice heads and I were on an adventure to the Trewin Adult Hostel (Cody and Meg are staying there while Cody's broken leg heals, Nick "lives" there occasionally when he’s not shacking up with his new lady friend, well she’s probably not new but new to me hahahah, holy sidebar, focus Val!) So I dress Luke up in his finest guido attire and blow his hair out like Pauly D and we are off to Tess's. Ryde is safe at this moment as he’s still a lil young for Mom's humiliation :) So we are watching the past shows before the new one airs, Cody is of course complaining about why we have to watch the old ones, Tess is making dinner, Luke is repeating "outside" a million times a minute, and I once again start thinking "why do I try and take this kid anywhere before he’s 8!" Finally its 8 pm and what I have been waiting for has finally arrived!! But do you think I get to sit down and enjoy it hahaha of course not, Luke, bless his soul, is whinnying about everything, trying to play with the baby mat Ryde is laying in, and just being an all around toddler tool. Repeating things he wants, asking to go play in the dark, harassing the dogs, junkin up Aces baby toys he hasn’t even got to play with, so basically the usual hahaha. I missed half the show because I was trying to read books, get him to eat his dinner Aunt Tess made just for him, and keep him from slipping into a full blown baby melt down. At one point I couldn’t wait for the show to end so we could just go home and go to bed! (Another side bar I had been up since 4:45am thanks to my new work schedule so I could spend more time with the boys now that I’m back to work, seriously reconsidering that decision hahaha sike, I kid I kid! So I’m sure my patience was a lil more thin then normal) The show ends I pack up the boys and we are headed home, but it doesn’t end there, why would it?!? So we are walking to my car and Tess's sprinklers are on which Luke doesn’t really get because its dark out side and he continues to walk right through the yard getting soaked with no shoes on because I thought "we are just walking to the car he doesn’t need to put his shoes on" I was sadly mistaken, as usual, so now he’s pissed that he has wet socks, now I can totally relate to this as I also hate wet socks, just a hour earlier I had to take mine off because I had one wet sock after stepping in water while filling Cody's ice machine, but I didn’t feel it warranted crying about it but he did so I put Ryde down next to the car on the side walk as I try to grab Luke who is still wondering amislly in the wet yard crying because he doesn’t quite get what’s going on and why he has water in his eyes. So I open Luke’s door to let him crawl in my brand new car soaking wet (if that’s not love, I don’t know what is people!) when Tess opens the other side door saying "um well I guess my sprinklers suck because they were spraying on Ryde on the side walk" hahaha of course they were why wouldn’t they be, this is my nightmare. Ryde, like me didn’t find it necessary to cry about being a lil wet which was nice so at least I didn’t have two crying kids on my hands! Ugh so we were finally on our way home and all I’m thinking about is a cold beer and then going straight to bed!!! Of course once we get on our way home Luke turns back in to the sweet lil nugget that he is and starts talking about the moon and that he loves me and I couldn’t help but not be annoyed anymore. I find it quite amazing how easy it is for him to change my mood, because we all now I'm the easily annoyed one as my mom likes to put it, (got to love a mothers sugar coating) and Josh can contest to that haha So we get home and put sweet loving boy to bed, aka toddler tool and start the process for getting baby tool to bed. And was officially in bed by 10:30 to start it all over again in 6 hours. Man oh man I have a greater appreciation for my parents as I’m sure big Luke and I were a couple of toddler tools our selves! Till our next failed attempt as an outing together, as Luke would say “later dudes”

Tee Shirt time!

3 Ring Circus Outing with Luke, Ryde, and Ace

So Tess and I decided to take the boys for a day out on the town a couple Thursdays ago and in theory it was a good idea but I definitely was underestimating Luke's ability to act like a stage 5 terrorist and how high maintenance two 1 1/2 month olds are!! So the shit show was first to start at noon but of course didn't get off the ground running till around 1ish as Tess had to borrow Uncle Lloyd's truck as my car was dead and we could not fit 3 car seats in the back of her car. Now this was a smooth transition at first but Tess soon realized that her stroller was in the back of her car that was now at Southlands with her dad not to mention Ace of course was screaming with hunger right as she was ready to leave so of course she had to feed him before she could drive to southlands ( which is 15 mins the opposite direction of my house) so she was finally on her way to my house running a lil late and all hot and bothered ;) , thank god because I was all hot and bothered at my house and there was no way I was going to be ready at noon either! So with the extra 30 mins I was able to have my boys ready when she showed up and by ready I mean I had actually packed a useful diaper bag unlike the usual one with only diapers, no snacks, no change of clothes etc, I have gotten lazy now that Luke is 2 but forget I have a new baby who is A LOT more high maintenance! So we loaded the car seats and the boys and we were on our way, but not before we stopped for a red bull so I could try and get my chi right before we got to the outlet mall. So we were headed to the outlet malls down in Castle Rock because that is where Matt and Tess had purchased their rings that she was having cleaned. So we finally arrive after a bumpy ride in the F150 which was not forgiving with our newly mom bodies haha so we decided it would be wise to be those dicks who take up 2 parking spots as there was no way in hell Tess was parking that big ole rig in just one spot! And we swear someone honked at us which of course got us riled up, we were thinking just wait till you see the train wreck that's about to roll out of this truck. So we start unpacking the kids and strollers which takes like 10 mins by its self, so we were finally on our way to shop! First stop, ring store, Luke had done so well holding on to the stroller as we walked across the parking lot and up to the jewelry store but for some reason as soon as we set foot in the store he began acting like a wild banchee, running every where, jumping over imaginary things, and then kicks one of the counters, yep kicks it, you cant make this stuff up people! So I immediately say we are going to wait outside, obviously hahaha so we wait outside for Tess to come out. Luke is running and jumping off the lil stone wall in the court yard area and all I'm thinking was this was a bad idea; the kid is 2 and has no plans on listening to anything I say at this point. So Tess comes out and we are headed to the Carter's outlet, and Luke maybe held on to the stroller for 2 seconds on our way there and of course we have to pass the Toys R Us outlet who have their stupid doors open and all I’m thinking is I hope Luke doesn’t notice it haha yeah right! He goes running in screaming “TOYS!” so I have to leave the stroller outside with Tess and literally have to run in after him. I finally catch up to him at the very back of the store and now have to carry him screaming "NO" all the way back outside. And then when we gat back to the strollers and I try to hold his hand while pushing the stroller he pulls dead weight and just lays on the ground! Ugh, embarrassing right!?! So I had to take Ryde out of his car seat that is clicked into the stroller and sit Luke in it and hold Ryde while I push toddler tool in the stroller. This is right where the baby pouch would have come in handy, note to self bring that every where I go from now on, not that ill be venturing out alone with them any time soon again! Anyway so we finally make it to the Carters store and I’m trying to maneuver the stroller through the store. Now for a store that only sells baby clothes they don’t make the store very stroller friendly especially one with a toddler in it! So I had to let Luke run free in the store so I could put Ryde down but thankfully the one thing the store that only sells baby clothes has is a Leggo table!!! Luke played nicely on that thing for like 25 mins while I finished shopping. I did not want to leave once I was done and go back out to the unknown, but it was time for Luke to go to the candy store that Aunt Tess promised him. So I waited outside with the newbies, which I thought was going to be the easy job but once again, wrong hahaha I was standing there trying to hold both their pacifiers in at the same time and keep them both entertained as I watched Luke run around like a mad man in the candy store picking up everything and saying "this, this this?" Of course Aunt Tess spoiled him and bought him a few things but his favorite was a monster truck bus which we should have just bought first because he was totally entertained by it, another not to self, buy present first thing! So as we leave the candy store and it starts to sprinkle, of course it did, anything that could have went wrong was going to go wrong! So we decide our short but exhausting trip was over and that we should head to the car well by the time we get to the parking lot it’s freaking pouring!! So Tess runs to the truck to pull up to the stores so we can load it there. Once again someone honks, like WTF people do you not see the 3 kids we are trying to wrangle up in this monsoon have some compassion dicks! Anyway we just start throwing stuff and kids in the truck and finally are ready to get on the road again. Tess and I are soaked but sweating at the same time hahaha and just want to go home and relax!! Luke of course talked the whole way pointing out everything we drove by which is cute at first but after about 20 mins I wanted to throw my self from the moving vehicle J We finally made it back to A-town for some much deserved nap times for me and Luke but of course Ryde had other plans for me, oh what was I thinking! Till our next shit show commences, Peace and Love

T-Minus 1 week till I'm back to H E Double Hockey Sticks!

So some how i only have one more week of maternity leave! WTF! I can not believe that in less then a week I will be headed back to the worst place on earth besides the DMV :( Ugh and the crying about this has already started hahaha I don't remember it being so bad with Luke but I also didn't have to go back to work till Luke was almost 6 months old. I feel like Ryde is still so small and cant imagine spending more then 8 hours away from him. This time has just flown by just hanging with my minions everyday, and I'm pretty depressed that I cant stay home with them permanently. And the shittier part is (yeah I said shittier...its a word, google it) that my car took a dump so my plan to go in early and get off early went up in flames and now I'll have to hitch a ride with big Luke but will have to figure out how to get home every night as he comes home after work maybe once a week. So it looks like this lady will be learning to ride the bus, how depressing does that sound right!?! Boo cars and their crappy timing! So this girl has to get back to work so she can buy a new car! oh and feed her children haha The one up side to this is that my friend Alisha will be able to watch the boys at our house! This was such a blessing to find someone who i have known since we were kids and can trust with my lil men, so i got that going for me... which is nice :)

Them Chavez Boys!

So I just could not be more in love with these lil men of mine! I'm excited to say that Luke just LOVES his lil brother. From day one he wanted to hold him and help feed him and is always concerned when Ryde starts crying. "oh no, baby Ryde crying" hahaha it is just too precious! I'm glad that he likes him and isn't trying to give him away to strangers haha I have had friends tell me stories like that about how they or their siblings reacted when the new family member came home. So here are some pics of the boys together :)

First day home

First Bath Together

At the Hospital

Watching Luke's fav, Mickey Mouse :)

Loves to help feed Ryde

My Boys

Terrible, No-Good, Very Bad, Twos

So my golden boy has reached his terrible 2's unfortunately and on top of that we have brought a new baby home which is totally infringing on his mommy and daddy time. Well mostly mommies time considering I'm Ryde's main food source hahaha So to say the least the first couple weeks were a lil crazy and draining!

So my parents were taking the boat out for Big Luke's birthday so I thought this would be a good opportunity to take the boys out in the real world, since we spend a lot of time at home since Ryde has been born. So i get the boys all packed and ready to go to spend the day at Cherry Creek Reservoir. Now this process took about an hour to get them both in swim gear then packing the car with everything I would need to entertain them for around 4 hours I was thinking. So finally we are on the road and I was looking forward to having a beer with some friends while Luke played in the sand and water but boy was I dreaming! As soon as we get there he is in that whinny mood where everything he says has to come out in the whinny voice. Ugh how I hate that, cant you just be in a bad mood but talk normal why does it have to come out in THAT voice hahaha so anyways I was hoping once he was playing in the dirt and shit he would perk up and get in a better mood. Well Luke had other ideas! He was having none of everything and if Pa wasn't focusing ALL of his attention on him he would throw a fit. Of course his Nonnie tries to reason with him when he's in this mood which I try to explain every time there is NO negotiating with terrorists! But she doesn't seem to care and was trying to talk him off the cliff which of course never works. So after only 1 hour at the lake this momma had had enough and it was time to go. There's no reasoning with a 2 year old so he was going home where he can act like a tool all he wants in his room by himself. Oh the joys of parent hood right?!? No matter what plans you have in your head they don't really matter if your 2 year old is not on the same page! I have a feeling a lot of my posts are going to end like this for awhile now :)I managed to take about 6 pics while we were there before we had to leave. He sure is lucky he is so cute!!

Hahaha This is the face that made us leave early

Ryde was pissed that we had to leave hahaha

Ryde Tannen Chavez is here!!!!

Our lil man made his appearance on Wednesday June 8th 2011 at 11:24 pm! He was 8lbs 2 oz and 20 inches long! Now Ryde's birth story is a lil different then his big brothers but just as stressful. When I was pregnant with Luke, At my 20 week ultra sound they told me that my blood work came back and Luke had a 40% chance of having Spina Bifida. They proceeded with the ultra sound and said everything looked good but we wouldn't know anything for sure until he came. Now for anyone who knows me, knows that I am a HUGE worry wart! You name it I've worried about it!! Even had ulcers at one point because of it, and as much as I know its pointless to worry its just something you cant shut off and I have been doing it my whole life. SO needless to say I worried for the next 4 months. With Luke my water broke a month before his due date and I was in labor for a total of 12 hours from when my water broke to him being born. I remember being really scared because Luke was exactly a month early and we were not sure if he was ready to come so early, but thankfully he was and came out after 2 whole pushes hahaha I know its not fair but its the truth :) He was perfect and was able to come home 5 days later after 2 extra days under the lights because he had some jaundice because him and I have different blood types.

Now with my baby boy Ryde, the worrying started at my 20 week ultrasound also. They found that his kidneys looked enlarged thanks to something called pyelectasis which basically means extra fluid in the kidney. It is found more often in boys then girls and for the most part corrects itself before baby is born. Of course the only thing I heard from my doctor was that its sometimes a soft marker for Down Syndrome. So you can imagine the next 4 months I worried and worried. They also noticed that he was measuring big which could be a problem if he went full term. At my 35 week appt my doctor told me that I was already 3 cm dilated so the baby could come any day but to try and wait 2 weeks so he's fully cooked! Ryde had a different plan unlike his big brother he liked it inside there and had no plans of exiting even after a 10 mile walk day with his G-Ma (I'm not exaggerating either, 10 miles!) But finally a day shy of being 39 freaking weeks I had some bleeding so I knew it was time so Josh came and picked me up from work and we headed to St Joes, now the nurse in the triage center was NOT on my same page and told me I was going to need to walk for 2 hours even though I was already 4 cm!! To say the least I was not happy about this plan! First of all it was like 90 degrees outside, I was in my work clothes and my chucks which are my most comfortable shoes but not if I'm going to be walking 5 miles around the hospital grounds!!!!!! But i wanted Ryde to come so I sucked it up and started walking. The first lap Josh and Luke walked with me but it was about time for Luke to take a nap so Josh took him home to do so and to grab a few other things that I had forgot to tell him to grab as he was packing my hospital bag. Yeah that's right i refused to pack a bag as I thought it would jinx baby Ryde to never come hahaha so Josh had to do it that morning. So after 2 hours I went back in to be checked and she said I had only gone up 1/2 cm and said i could go home or walk another hour. Now I was ready to just drive my ass home as I was too pregnant to be doing all this walking but she convinced me to do the hour so I was off again. Now i proceeded to be stopped by like 15 people during my walks asking if I was in labor and needed help, as I would respond "I think I'm in labor but they don't" hahaha and of course the last 10 mins i had the worst foot cramp ever so on top of my already ridiculous pregnancy waddle I had a peg leg limp, quite the shit show. So I barley make it back to the triage center to be checked and I'm at 5 cm! But shes still acting like I'm not going up stairs to have a freaking baby so i fake a contraction so she would hook me up to the monitor. Which works!! She hooks me up and 5 mins later i start having regular contractions 4 to 3 mins apart. By this time Wendo had made it to the hospital from work and we were headed upstairs to have a baby!! When we got up there they asked me right away if I wanted an epidural which I thought was too soon as my contractions were not bothering me really but they reminded me that I was already 5 cm ( how could I forget!) and that it was a good time to get one so I of course agreed. After that it was just relax time with the fam till about 9 pm when mini Luke started getting crabby as it was bed time, so him and Pa headed home for the night. Big Luke headed out to a work softball game and other extra curricular activities so it was just me, the LP, and Wendo. At about 10:30pm we convince Josh to go to Mc D's cuz Wendo hadn't had dinner and was starving. As he was leaving he reminded me that i better not have the baby while he was gone, which i dismissed with a" yeah yeah" not 5 mins later do i feel the urgent need to poop! So i tell my mom who proceeds to tell me, "you better not poop till josh gets back" and my response is "I don't want to poop when Josh is here, im going to ask the nurse if we can figure it out while hes gone!" So i call the nurse in and explain that i really need to go #2 and would like to try before my life partner makes it back. She said sure but wanted to check me to see how far along i was first. As she was doing that Josh walks in thank god because the nurse was like "yep theres no cervix" and all I say is "so wait i don't get to poop?" hahaha and she reminded me that I don't really need to poop but my body wants to push a baby out. So she tells me NOT to push which was the worst, most painful part of the whole child birthing experience for me! I couldn't push because they had to get the room set up and then she sends in the slowest nurses aid of all time! The women proceeds to take her sweet ass time setting up the room and all I could do was stare at her and think to myself I may punch this women in the face if she doesn't start to show some urgency! I'm barely holding an 8lbs baby from falling out on to the hospital floor here women! Thankfully I'm some what of a bad ass and was able to refrain from popping him out during this time and the nurses and doctors had arrived and it was finally time to push. Now as I'm getting ready to meet my lil man I cant help but notice one nurse bring over a step ladder. Yeah that's right a step ladder, what the hell do we need one of those for right?!? Yeah that's what I was thinking too, Wendo notice this lil ditty too and asked "whats that for" which the nurse told her that sometimes with big babies they need to get high for some leverage to pull him out" and I'm thinking WTF, I better not see anyone climbing a fucking ladder during my labor, sorry for cursing but really a ladder! Thankfully I only had to push 3 times and he came right out (this body was built for banging down low hahaha) and there was no need for a ladder or the 4 extra nurses in there. He was finally here and I balled like a baby when they set him on my chest. It was nice this time that he got to hang out with me for like an hour before they weighed him and all that jazz (what am I 60..all that Jazz hahaha) So once again I cant complain about this labor experience and he came out perfect so maybe all the worrying paid off;) We were able to come home on the 3rd day but he needed some at home tanning action as we also have different blood types so he was jaundice but other then that it was a pretty easy transition home. And now my family of 3 is now 4 and complete. It felt like it took him forever to get here but I'm so glad hes here and am very blessed to have 2 strong, healthy boys and couldn't be happier! Peace and Love